DATE: January 31st, 2025
FROM: David Opal Jr.
SUBJECT: The Jeff Tech Psyop
Hello,
My name is David Opal Jr. I’m an independent journalist. I have a story you may be interested in. It involves a psyop that took place in Steubenville during the 90s. I’m giving you first access to this report. If you don’t hear back from me within a week, that means I’ve gone missing due to these bombshell findings.
Please get this information to the public. They deserve the truth.
Best,
David Opal Jr.
P.S. Tell my mother I love her.
This pysop happened in 1995, back when the city was just a bit more rusty…
Jeff Tech Hill—it was your textbook, sledding hill located outside of the local community college. Middle of town. Long and wide. A gradual section for the youngins. A steep section with an ice ramp for the rebels (or anyone easily influenced by peer pressure). All it took was a few inches of snow, and the hill would be flooded with kids, just like you’d see in the movies. Rows of sledders waited at the top of the hill for someone to yell out, “GO!” so they could race to the frozen creek at the bottom.
It was pure small-town livin’. Kids having fun. Parents happy cuz their kids were happy. Sounds good, right? Wrong.
Everything ended abruptly, and this marked the beginning of the psyop.
Phase one psyop
The killjoys, the hall monitors, the fun police, the fossils, the grown-ups—whatever you want to call them—told all the kids they weren’t allowed to sled there anymore. Too many kids were getting hurt. They even used the “L-word”…liability.
Still, to this day, no kid has ever heard this verdict from a first-hand source at Jeff Tech or the city—only random adults. Begging the question, was this all manufactured?
Phase two psyop
The local mall was struggling to stay open that winter. Kids had no money, and their parents would much rather drop them off at Jeff Tech; it was free, and they could get into only so much trouble there.
Enter Stanley Kowalski—the owner of the mall.
Thanks to an anonymous tip from Jonny Anders, it was revealed that Stanley was best friends with the president of Jeff Tech. Their families vacationed in Myrtle Beach every summer, and they both shared the same illegal bat in their church softball league.
Stanley had a need, and his friend had the solution.
Further digging suggested that Stanley paid off his friend to shut down Jeff Tech’s hill, forcing all of the kids to fill the void left from sledding. Where exactly would they fill this void? You guessed it—at Stanley’s mall.
As the kids would say, the mall was now “bumpin’.” Parents were forced to allocate part of their Powerball investment so that their kids had money to spend at Stanley’s mall. But this plan backfired on Stanley in spectacular fashion when the impossible happened. The mall was now “too bumpin’.”
Fights erupted on a nightly basis. Seventh-grade “soulmates” broke up across the valley after new schools and eligible soulmates arrived. Chaos ensued. And when the kids weren’t causing physical trouble, they were, to their parents’ guttural dismay, buying parental advisory CDs.
Stanley had no choice but to ban swaths of kids and kick their friends out until spring.
Phase three psyop
At first, the parents didn’t mind. Less money to fork over to their kids and more money to invest in Powerball. But this, too, crumbled quickly.
With nowhere to go, their kids turned to the neighborhood streets, “collecting” their neighbor’s lawn ornaments, drilling cars with snowballs, swapping people’s addresses, and, worst of all, stuffing mailboxes with [REDACTED].
Their parents were forced to keep their kids inside like the family dog. The first few days were actually fruitful. It was good old-fashioned, quality family time. That is until the kids got obsessed with Mario Kart and discovered how to prank people using three-way calling.
Final phase psyop
Parents were in a jam. What could they possibly do with their kids to survive these winter months? They would have no choice but to take matters into their own hands. Parents would need to suck it up, bundle up, and go outside to play with their kids. Yes, even when it’s frigid out.
So, who was behind this psyop? Who orchestrated this master plan starting with Jeff Tech, predicting the human course of behavior all the way to parents’ having no choice but to grow closer to their kids?
No one other than a psyop brought to you by your local community center promoting their new campaign, “The Year of the Family.” Their manager —David Opal Sr.—socially engineered every level of it, all so he could be promoted to president. He first planted the seed to Stanley, predicting what would likely happen next. He single-handedly ruined sled riding in the valley all for the sake of a job title. And for the record, his son would never forgive him for this.
Some may ask why people don’t sled ride at Jeff Tech now. And that’s a valid question. There is one more conspiracy, though. This one involves a mine shaft at the bottom of Jeff Tech’s hill that leads into an underworld where all your nightmares come true.
But that story is for another day.
